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Hey guys, right at the very start let me make it absolutely clear (in case there is even an iota of doubt) that the next few hundred words are NOT about a teenage crush. Naah! So, those of you looking for "aunty" kinda of advise - reboot. Mix yourself some G&T because I mean what's the big deal about a teenage crush? It's like a pimple, but natural. Like "dog bites man"- non-news, as our journalism professor often said.
Now declaring crushes in your fabulous 40s, hmmmmm, that's something to talk about, like Bonnie Raitt crooned in her Grammy-winning number. It's "man bites dog"... in other words: NEWSWORTHY. Something to share with your soul sistas, who would get it. Completely.
Like this one time recently when me and my girlfriend had one of the best days chasing our collective heartthrob, the mega handsome Spanish golfing ace Rafael Cabrera-Bello. Ooh la la. Muy Bien!
The prestigious Hero Cup was underway at the magnificent DLF Golf Course, and it was one of those rare occasions when non-golfers are allowed to walk across the 18 spectacular holes. Sheer bliss. And a once in a lifetime opportunity, that we were not going to miss for anything! All along we ooh-ed and aah-ed like giggly school-girls. I think, I think Rafa noticed too, my girlfriend can vouch for that. My teen, however, was among the junior golfers volunteering as score keepers, and had this quizzical, almost scandalized look every time he passed us by. His one reaction, whenever I loudly declare my "love" for any of my innumerable crushes, is "ok, so go , marry him!" Quite amusing, if you ask me. Poor little dear!
The best thing about having crush is that it's not about "owning" or "achieving" but purely this wonderful feeling that flits about like a beautiful butterfly in your life and in fact introduces you to a part of yourself that loves, laughs, lives freely. This inner core that is still pure and uniquely individual, but buried deep within the stifling patina of duties, responsibilities, deadlines, milestones & this constant effort to fit in! Do some dusting girl! For, despite being called a CRUSH, it's actually quite liberating. Not to be confused with things like an infatuation or one-sided love, lust, desperation, desire or anything cougar or raunchy. None of that! Just "your favourite distraction!" The best part: it's to do with the feeling and not the person per se, so NO expiry date! Whoa!
A heart that loves, LIVES and love is so multi-dimensional, even a lifetime isn't enough to truly discover each delightful facet. A crush being one such facet! And you can have multiple crushes going for you at one time. Yup you can, certainly at 40! Isn't it famously being called the "new 20s." The gorgeous Heidi Klum declares that, and I am so totally going with her!
Right at this very moment, my crush chart is choc-a-bloc. The interns include Ranveer Singh (he's a dish in every movie..mooch or no mooch), Farhan Akhtar (feel like saying irshad), Shahid Kapoor (donno how many times I've ogled at his adoring pic with Misha), and a small smattering of television hunks. The evergreens firmly ensconced in my heart are - SRK, my childhood sweetheart (I am all set to book my ticket for When Harry Met Sejal); then the ultra calm and collected MSD: uff that guy just sends my heart spinning, every time. Kapil Dev- I mean seeing him cry on National Television was one of the most heart breaking things, then Dharmendra: the years really don't matter, he is the BAAP! Full-STAAP!! Oh! And how can I forget: the still single Milind Somen: I think God broke the mould after hand-crafting that one!
There's my "angrez" list too in case you were wondering I am racist, starting with the lissome Bruce Lee to the brawny John Cena, Brock Lesner be damned. Brad was on my list too, till his infidelities, and now he's in the pits! Matthew McConaughey, along with Channing Tatum, Daniel Craig and actor par excellence Javier Bardem are definitely drool-worthy. Plus Morgan Freeman, it's to do with the voice, pure velvet! I mean we also have our very own AB, but it's either Jai or Veeru and I have made my choice! But it's not all about glamour and tinsel. I have this whole other private list that starts with Obama (Oh Mama) and ends with Ed Sheeran (croon, swoon so completely rhyme), Jamie Oliver & Federer!
Never quite liked Clooney and Gere that way though! But I think I had a wee bit of a crush on Raghuram Rajan as well; intelligence, you see, is VERY attractive. If it was looks I would have been drooling over Shashi Tharoor - man that guy is a looker. Nada!
There are many many many more.... but it's not "truth day."
Which brings me to this very interesting article that appeared a while ago: Women prefer good looks over intelligence and civility in men, finds US study. Hey My God! As far as I am concerned, and I think I speak for a whole generation of women, the study proves only 2 things: either there are NO intelligent men left (quite believable in Covefe Country) OR morons conducted the survey; either way its best we do not dignify the survey with a retort and leave the idiots be in their self-styled masochistic cocoons. What women really want is - just men WORTHY of being called men! The Notebook nailed it with - "I have a crush on your mind, I fell for your personality, and your looks are just a big bonus."
So then, take a sip of your G&T girls, munch on some bruschetta and crush on! Go ahead and believe me it's the best therapy for your lovely soul! It gives a spring to your step, brings a smile on your face and this deeply satisfying feeling of being ALIVE! What the heck? 40s are the new, improved 40s and I am totally loving it!