"Tere haath ki roti"
|   Jun 27, 2017
"Tere haath ki roti"

I was born in a simple lower middle class family. My mother worked as a teacher in a school and my father had a government job.

All of us siblings had been taught to contribute in the household work and as a family,we would do our bit to move the household on well oiled wheels 

I took my mother's habits into my new household. My mother would lovingly iron my father's shirts to make them creaseless,cook for the whole family and do small knick knacks for each member. That was her way of showing love and that was how I wanted to.

Years passed and I kept on doing things whether I would have to get up at four in the morning or sleep at one at night.I kept on doing without any support and in the routine of doing all this,I forgot that my mother would be home at two,whereas I would be home at eight thirty. The whole chemistry of involvement got missed by me,as I took up a part of my mother's teaching.

By now, it was too late and everyone had gotten used to this. Try as I might,my family refused to eat the food cooked by a cook or the rotis made by the house help.

I would be forced to do things even when I was not well. And,this self neglect started taking its toll on me. Very soon,I had all the diseases,which were entirely my fault.I was the one responsible for feeding the entire family,but the vice versa was not true at all.

Who was the culprit if not me?

Try as much to put the blame on the other,I would one day have to take full responsibility of this. I would no longer be blackmailed into the "Tere haath ki roti"syndrome.

I will take care of my own self before taking care of my family. Because if I am happy,they will be too. A lot of love goes into a meal and it is that love which keeps the family together. But,when that love changes into a demand,when it becomes devoid of a choice,then it does not remain love. It becomes an order. And,that is when the equation gets  imbalanced.

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