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I went to my child's school today to pay her fees. On the way back I met another child's mother who studies in the same class as my daughter's. She first asked my kid's name in tamil. I thought she is one of those who knows only Tamil, so I tried answering in sign language. Then she asked me "Tamil terima" (do you know to speak tamil). And I still thought that that's the only language she can communicate in. But then she started in fluent english. She said my kid doesn't allow her kid to touch her. I answered that my daughter some how doesn't like anyone to touch her. She asked me why. I did not have the answer either but I believe that it was just her nature. She continued telling that how her son complains that my daughter cries when he touches her. I again said that she did have a bad experience in her previous school where teachers used to shrug there shoulders and threat them to be beaten. May be that was one reason she doesn't like anyone to touch her. And then very sarcastically she said that my daughter had problem only with dark complexion kids and not the fairer ones. I did not knew this. But I did not understand that why was this an issue for the other child's mother? Was it not as simple as just telling her son that you should not touch anyone if he/she doesn't like it? Why was she keen in convincing my daughter that she was wrong if she did not like anyone to touch her. After all it's our choice. Even adults don't like every one to touch them. Then why do we expect this from a kid. Shouldn't mothers teach their sons right from the beginning that they should not touch anyone without their consent? Have you seen babies crying when they see a person wearing spectacles for the first time. The same might be happening with my daughter. Being from north she has always seen fair skinned people around her. May be dark skinned person is just like an alien to her. Slowly she will understand that they are just like us. But is it the right way to tell her that she should let anyone to touch her even if she is not comfortable?
I request all the parents and all the teachers not to judge a child. They are new to this world. Something which is very normal to us might be just a new adventure or a threat to them. May be there is a past behind their sensitivity. May be there is a disorder or a disease behind their inability to study or play. May be there is a family problem behind their fears. May be there is story behind every 'May be'.