Mom’s return to work: First day separation’s pain in DAYCARE
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|   Nov 06, 2015
Mom’s return to work: First day separation’s pain in DAYCARE

After 2 years of maternity break in my career, I planned to go back to my profession. With little struggle I was able to get an opportunity to go back. But I was ready to go back but my heart was not at all ready .After getting offer letter, I hugged my Priyansh (my Son) who was still on breastfeeding and had cried a lot. My innocent 1.4 years toddler also started crying but my husband acted before us as a very practical, with no emotion in heart and told don’t worry best mom of the world we will give our quality time to Priyansh. We finalized a daycare after visiting many.

With half sleep I got up early morning and finished all my works then I went to my son around 7:30 AM. My cutie pie was in deep sleep but don’t know, how he came to know that mumma is near to him and he came to my lap. I gave him a bottle of milk took him out. After some time I made him ready. He got ready very happily by seeing new colorful daycare bag. When we started our new journey he was quite happy and we reached daycare center. One ayamma (maid) came to pick him, but my son hold me tightly and that terrible cry…..I cannot explain. Forcefully maid took him inside and continuous sound Mumma, Mumma, Mumma was coming from inside. We waited there for half an hour. After half an hour I saw my son from CCTV, he was sitting in a corner with a maid, totally tired after crying for 30 minutes, but still crying in low pitch keep on saying mumma mumma. I also got tears and my husband was totally quiet, we were feeling like we are the worst parent, helpless, demotivated and I thought I will take him back and will go to home. I was scolding myself why I became so selfish who is thinking for her career and aims only, why I am playing with my child’s childhood, and so many things. But I managed my emotions somehow and came out from daycare and reached to office on first day with tearful eyes. I did all joining formalities but I was very quiet not talking at all to other new joiners. On lunch break, when all my teammates went for lunch I was on my seat and thinking have I taken right decision to come back to work? Like this whole day got over and we picked Priyansh little early. As we reached daycare center, he saw us run to us and climbed to me.Hold my neck tightly and didn’t turn back at all and told me Mumma Ghar Mumma Ghar (He was trying to say Mumma let’s go home).We reached home he was very calm & he was not at all interested to play, to eat only one thing he was keep on telling Mumma Mumma. So that night we were discussing whether to go ahead for job or to stay at home. But we planned and followed some tips that worked wonderfully. Now my son is 4 years and 5 months he is very happy to go to day care & school too. He is doing very well in his studies also, very much homely also, close to his grandparents, cousins too. He is now disciplined, jolly, and naughty like other kids who don’t go to daycare.

Some points we can look into:

  • We sent our kid to daycare bit early in age 1 year 4 months when my son was just speaking few words and his sign language daycare people were not able to understand. So I think correct age to put child in daycare is after 2 years.
  • Daycare location should be close to house so child has not to travel and also at least one parent’s office should be near to daycare. So on emergency parent can reach easily.
  • If we opt daycare where less child are present will be good. Because child can get individual attention and care can be taken properly.
  • We should see for children and maid ratio. Because I have seen in daycare one maid feeds 5-6 children at a time. So children have to wait for long for second bite. Same case in sleeping time as well as in potty time too.
  • Daycare center should be kid’s friendly, having CCTV which can capture all area of daycare.
  • If we go for registered daycare it is safe.
  • At least one parent should have flexible job if it is mother then it’s too good. So child can be picked on time. Don’t stretch child’s pick up time.
  • We should finish our office work within office hours, after coming from office we should spend full time with kids. Play with them, tell bedtime stories, and make eating time, bath time very fun full. I cook after coming from offic,so that time also I make him to seat in kitchen and we together sing songs, rhymes, talk and sometime I give him potato or onion for counting, I give some utensils to him to arrange properly.
  • Morning make your kid to get up at least 1 hour before leaving home and before he wakes up try to finish most of the works
  • Make kid ready in fun manner not in hurry and must feed breakfast to kid. Kid will take an hour but from starting if we make a habit then they will be used to.
  • We should give them right food to increase their immunity. Because in day care getting cough, cold is very common.
  • For school going kids daily we can make study time too. Many daycare they help child for their homework given by school. But as a parent it’s our duty to make a habit of daily study time at least for an hour. Start this habit from nursery class itself.
  • Not every day but weekly 2-3 times we should take them for cycling, on weekends we can take them for some other activity may be movie, park, temple, friend’s house, and outing.
  • We think child will be happy with more toys. So we buy very costly toys for them but we don’t teach them how to play and we don’t play also. But this is not correct I have seen my son becomes happier when my husband makes a paper rocket, paper bomb and play with him.
  • We should celebrates all occasions and festivals at least in small way so they will know family rituals, about festivals.
  • We should plan our vacation with child at least twice a year. Vacation is not always going for a trip. We can visit to both grandparents’ houses.
  • Daily we can ask kid’s how the day was in daycare and what all things they did at daycare.

So dear parents please stop thinking that we are not justifying with kids, kids are losing their childhood. This is wrong. But our kids are getting company to play, getting opportunity to become independent, they are able to take care of their own belongings. Be confident on your parenthood and spend best quality time with kids.

 

Viewers you can amend some more points so it can be useful to many parents. Your comments and feedbacks are always welcome.

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