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I have seen my pals changing their pictures with kiddos so often that even when I feel good to see those happy faces I still rue the fact if I am the only one whining about this phase. I am not denying that the best gift from marriage has been my daughter and I am thankful to the Almighty for this but I won’t hide the fact that there are times I cringe for being a mom. Motherhood brings a lot of responsibility, where you become the centre of attention for your kid, and this doesn’t end in a year or two because your worries, problems continue to stay till you live. Once I read that many regret of becoming a parent because kids are a life-long worry for them.
I don’t know if my thinking process has gone blur with the grave disease or stressed bringing up a kid alone, but the fact is that I am reading too much into things. Life could be challenging for any mother be it the one from a remote town in Assam or a working mother in the financial hub like Mumbai. From getting up in the morning to preparing breakfast or lunch and going to work, then coming back to follow the same routine for the next day, life can be terribly mundane and tiring. But we have to realise that motherhood was not forced upon us, and since it’s our decision to bring that precious little life into this world, so one must strive to enjoy despite all the hardship. If we don’t find joy amid trivial things and dull routine we will continue to feel stuck up in the role of a mother.
Bring in positivity
Many of us take to positive thinking and look for inspirational quotes to instil some confidence, but nothing can really do wonder unless the desire comes from within. You may not have many friends to open your heart to; your mother-in-law may not be supportive enough, you are unable to go back to work or you could be working but still unhappy and waiting for your kid to grow up soon. I am sure many of us would be stuck in one of these situations. But the mantra is to have a positive outlook towards life.
Not let your mood affect kids
It’s said that one should not bring work at home similarly you should not let your mood affect the baby. You child may not stop surprising you each day with something new but there are days when that same child can be testing your patience. You have to continuously cope with their behaviour in different phases but what if you are tired of being protective all the time. Let the child be free and stop sweating over every small thing and if you are in a foul mood it’s better to let go. Never reflect your mood on the child because he or she is completely unaware of the issues you are facing.
Missing your circle, make friends with book
After a point it’s your husband who would be available to lend ears to your problems because everyone else is busy in life with their own issues. It’s you who have to find a way out and mend your broken heart and move on with a smile. For a stay-at-home mother it could be more upsetting where she is not able to socialise with people. So better than cribbing turn yourself to books. You can pick up any book inspirational, fiction, non-fiction, poetry that can comfort your vagabond mind.
Spend on your hobby or passion
The best thing is to invest time and energy in your passion. I am sure everyone will have some interest or hobby, and trust me this is the best time to get back to those lost days. Don’t think twice before investing money in your hobby if it demands so. You never know you could carve your niche in that area and create a business out of that. There are so many mompreneurs who started like this and you will be amazed to know their story. It could be taking some time out for yoga classes or zumba which will not just bring you in touch with people but take out all negativity around.
Cook, sing or dance to release the stress
It’s in your best interest that you take to cooking, dancing, writing, painting or whatever it takes to release your stress. If you think a head massage once or twice in a week is relaxing then just go for it and don’t worry about the money you spend in doing any of these. Remember you are not going to get back youth or this time of your life again, so pamper yourself with whatever makes you happy.
SAHM are my heroes, and every time I feel frustrated or depressed, I just think that the growing years of my kids are not going to come back so I have to make the most of it. I can always start my career from a low-paying job but I can’t start my motherhood from where I left my kids. So moms if you have any other suggestions to bring you out of this phase then do share your thoughts.