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Dreams are life. Yes The famous agate by elders " SAPNO MAIN MAT JIYO.....FACE REALITY!!!" sometimes make me think about it seriously. Who exists here without dreams in this world? Everyone in my eye is following his dreams or in a league to make it come true.
I love dreaming. Life needs a driving force to make it more worth and blissful. And that driving force is Dream; some name it goal, some aim and some targets.
When I was in my college I loved chemistry.How reactants react with each other and formed new compounds, how does chemicals play with each others property to give rise to new component,beautiful colours,mechanisms....each and everything related to chemistry attracted me towards it. I was only student who used to be super exited for Chemical practicals every turn.
Though I was only in my 1st year of graduation, I was very firm about my way, Research scientist in chemistry, The ultimate goal. And always focused on it for rest of years for that.
As my post graduation completed, I applied for a research Scholar in a university. I was selected, was ready to deposit fees within 15 days.
One day, between my "After exam" vacations ,Daddy was talking to some uncle , inviting him very generously to our home tomorrow. Before I could ask him to whom he was talking, Mumma chuckled me smiling and said, " Achche se tayar hona kal, ladke wale aa rahe hain"
"What the hell???? " Ya ...my first reaction to me for that. What would I do now? What about my Ph.D now? Marriage? So early??? And never ending questions.
I wasn't able to sleep that night. It wasn't so my parents didn't care of my dreams but they just wanted to get settled as the proposal was quite sound in each and every respect.
Finally the day arrived, That 10 minutes conversation decided my destiny. The boy ( now my husband pleasingly) said "Yes" for me. And we are happily married.I left home with all my childhood memories, toys, home, Mumma Papa and My PhD ....My first love before my husband.
When we( my husband and me) started being cozy with each other. I told him of my aspirations and luckily he supported me. He started searching good colleges in mumbai for research in chemical sciences. I gave entrance and passed it. I was lucky to find the most renowned guide to whom I was to assist.I was damn happy.I could see my dream closer to me. But it shattered one morning when I found my pregnency test positive.
Yes!!! I was positive. I was sad opposite to all other would be mothers. We discussed and decided to carry the baby, as I was not ready to play with any body's emotions at cost of my dreams.
It's been 1 year , Vihaan ( my boy) came to our life. Currently , I don't find any compatible way to leave home and step out for my research. He is dependent on me for his each and every need. Even I have to play with him as we lead a nuclear family life here in mumbai.
And as very well said Once a Mother Always a Mother.
His milestones, smiles, observing his petty actions while playing, understanding his to-dos and make him learn new something new everyday , are in my schedules now.
I sometimes, being optimistic, thinks of working Over my dreams once I am up with the span, my child needs me.
But till then, Let My chemistry books, with whom I had an obsessive love affair once upon a time, still wait for me to meet again.Hahaaa!!!
My love PH.D is still calling me, standing on the gate of college with bouquet of books and research journals.
And I happily said him, "SORRY Ph.D. " I AM SOMEONE ELSE'S NOW!!!"