How did I forgot that she is your grand daughter too....
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|   Nov 15, 2016
How did I forgot that she is your grand daughter too....

It was a lazy afternoon where my hubby and kids were sleeping after a heavy lunch. Though I was also feeling drowsy and attracted by their sleep, I wanted to have a me-time after a hard week and found it was the right time. My mind started to think about the "to be coming birthday party" of my two daughters the next week. I really wanted to make it very special as it was the first birthday of my younger one. Since we are now on onsite work and far away from our parents and relatives, I wanted to look back on the birthdays we celebrated in India. I leaned back on the chair and was refreshing my memory on the events happened so far on the celebrations. No wonder my memory chip on my mobile has all those lively moments captured, so I started looking into the birthday snaps. My mind time machine took me to the 1st birthday of my elder daughter...

Still I remember. She started to walk by her own without any support...It was a grand celebration...We had the party in my in-laws home...The hall was decorated with balloons and her photos taken so far...All relatives came...Cake is ready. Candle is lit...Me and my hubby were on one side of my daughter and my in-laws were on the other side....Birthday song was sung...The photos in my mobile continued as me and my hubby feeding our daughter with the cake and she giving back to us, followed by the same ceremony by my in-laws and brother-in-law...I browsed through the photos again and again to see where my parents where...Alas...My mommy and daddy were peeping into the crowd to see what was happening with their grand daughter's celebration...Suddenly my heart became heavy as though a ton of rocks were on me..

My hands started shivering as I was checking the second birthday photos...It was in my home...Since my husband was out of the country, we wanted to have it simpler so we called our neighbours alone. This time the same ceremony followed where my in-laws were standing behind my kid helping her to cut the cake...Again my heart searched for my parents and sisters...I zoomed the snaps and saw that my mommy was not in the scene itself and my dad was standing far behind with his hands crossed on his chest and looking into the celebration...

I doesn't want to check her 2 other celebrations happened as I am sure what would have happened in that as well...Tears rolled down my cheeks...At that moment I was able to feel what my parents would have felt...Oh my God! What have I done all these years...The one who took care of my little one from the day one sacrificing their sleep, friends chitchat and other leisure time were not recognized and respected by their own daughter...Is it because the ownership of my daughter started from the very first day of her birth in the hospital itself saying "Our grandchild or she resembles like me or she has to be named as my grand parents or whatever" by my hubby's side ???? Is it because I wanted to be a good daughter-in-law prioritising my in-laws in all the functions or to make them feel proud and comfortable to make my life easier or to please my husband or whatever"???? I know that blaming others is a disability of the human kingdom. Whatever may be the reason but I failed as a daughter. It is not about the matter of giving importance or least bothered to make their presence felt but I have taken them and their relationship for granted. I have indirectly preaching my kids that your mother's parents have less rights on you than your father's parents.

Why am I thinking all these now. Am I afraid of facing the same situation in future since I have 2 daughters?? I deliberately wanted to say Sorry to my parents for what has happened. When I checked the time, It was late night in India. The whole night I cried and was thinking of all the good times I made my parents proud in front of others. I asked myself, will the bond of marriage change everything??? I was waiting to make a call. I wanted to speak so many things to them, wanted to cry aloud and say, I'm sorry "Mommy & Daddy". The call got connected and when I said "Hello" my father on the other side asked, ''Dear, are you not feeling well. Your voice is so dull. Is everything fine there?? How is the planning for celebration is going on. Though we cannot come, our prayers will always be there for you all". I frightened to say sorry thinking it might hurt them but that moment I took an oath that I would never make this happen anymore and will make my parents feel special every time, everywhere whatever the situation is.

I know that what I do now will be done by my kids in turn than What I teach them...Let me start the change from me....

Love you mommy and daddy, please apologize...It is you who taught me correcting oneself soon after the mistakes and making sure of not doing it anymore will fulfil our life...Thanks and sorry again...

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