When you realize your child looks up to you for everything...
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|   Oct 20, 2016
When you realize your child looks up to you for everything...

My 18 month old Sarah managed to climb on a chair and open my make-up drawer to pull one of my lip-balms. Before I could stop her, she started climbing down with her tiny legs while clutching the balm tight in her right hand and then rushed to the dressing mirror. Like a pro she rotated the lid to open and then started rubbing the balm hard on both her upper and lower lips pursing it repeatedly in front of the mirror just like I would do. I couldn't hide my amusement and immediately grabbed my mobile to video shoot the moment to show it to my husband later that day. I never realized that when I was thinking my little one was only busy playing with her toys she was also observing her mommy applying lipstick. 'How cute', I thought. Feeling delighted beyond measure to see a mini version of me, I continued to cherish the moment completely forgetting about the milk I had kept on the stove to boil (Yes, it did boil over).

The next day when she returned from her playschool, I removed the diaper, washed her hands and feet and after dressing her up I rushed back to the kitchen to get her a glass of juice completely forgetting about the soiled diaper which I had kept on the stool. As I returned back from the kitchen, I was funnily surprised to see my lassie holding the diaper in her left hand and walking towards the trash-can. However, she had trouble opening it with her foot and looked up at me helplessly. Smiling, I gently pressed the pedal for her while she dropped the diaper into it and clapped her hands happily as if she had achieved something. That indescribably sweet moment made me realize that when I thought my daughter was only watching TV while I was doing all the cleaning, she was actually observing my actions too. I lifted her in my arms, kissed her repeatedly and then walked over to the sink to clean her hands with Dettol. What amazed me was that she not only did what I did but she also felt happy accomplishing doing what her mother did. How much she looks up to me, I thought to myself feeling proud.

But one specific incident alarmed me when my husband and I had a huge disagreement over something and we both were loud. He left for work without saying a word to me and I was furious. Crying, I threw myself on the bed while my little one was playing with her car in the corner of the room. In anger I continued to murmur and grumble saying things like 'Why did I ever end up marrying him', 'How could he do this to me' and 'How mean he is' and so on. (Hope you get the picture). Then during the afternoon my husband called me up and apologized for his behavior. But in the evening, when he returned home from office, my daughter ran towards me and hid behind. That was very unusual of her since she would always run towards her dad with open arms asking him to carry her to the garden. Removing his shoes, my husband started making funny faces and pulled my daughter gently from behind me and I was shocked to see that she shrieked and yelled clutching my hand tight and then when he continued to play with her she threw herself on the bed and started crying loud. I immediately realized what I had done while my husband was clueless about the whole thing. Feeling guilty, I briefly explained to him what had happened that morning and thankfully he was understanding. 'It's not just you, the mistake is mine too', he said kissing my forehead and then we both sat down beside our daughter. Putting her on my lap I started mollifying her while she continued to shut her eyes. 'Baby, we are not fighting, Mummy and Daddy love each other very much, see', I said and my husband gently hugged me from behind to make her understand by his actions. She slowly looked from one eye and then stared at us as if she was assessing us to see if we were telling the truth. Then when we continued to be in that position and when my husband kissed me on my cheek, my daughter's face immediately brightened up with a smile. She threw herself up on us and the next moment we were all in a tight embrace with tears of joy in our eyes. That night my husband and I made a promise to never fight in front of our daughter ever again.

'Children are like wet cement, whatever falls on them makes an impression'. I never realized the truth behind the quote until I had Sarah in my life. After realizing that she looks up to me and my husband for everything I have transformed myself in many things and my husband has changed a but too. We are very careful with our choice of words and behavior. We both would not have done that for any other reason probably. Sarah is in a way our teacher. When she would play with my maid's kind and share her toys too, she taught me that children don't discriminate on the basis of money, when I would scold her for her bad behavior and then after a few minutes when she'd rushed towards me to embrace me she taught me that love is not holding grudges or harboring resentment against each other. At times when I am sad or in tears she wipes them away hugging me until I put a smile back on my face I learnt that love does not easily let go. She is my strength and my support and a crucial part of my life. Of course, I have difficult nights when she doesn't sleep even after several hours of stroking her hair, my patience is tested with her stubborn demands, her persistent crying drives me crazy, often I'm at my wit's end when she screams without telling me what she wants and I feel drained off all my energy at the end of the day a lot. I often wonder if there ever will come a phase in my life when my kids would stop being difficult or trouble me? Probably No. But again when I think if this roller-coaster ride is all worth in the end? Yes, very much yes. Of course it is worth every sacrifice and worth every pain and if needed I would do it all over again.

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