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Being married 5 years now..
The journey has been a mix of experience. Like a tamed Indian girl, I have grown with the values typical to marriage. Your world revolves around your husband, do as you are told to do, you should just think of please him et all. How, I looked at it was slightly different. Whatever restrictions I had during my teens, I was all set to break them and go my way to a more liberated me... Probably with the thought that what I feel and what I want to experience I can share them all with my partner and wooo I will get the chance to do them all...
Hold your horses lady.... Life isn't that simple. It does come up with lot more than what you think. You are expected to behave in a certain way even if your partner comes with an 'open-minded' easy to go person. You can't have your tomboy stuffs and conversations with your male buddies like before, neither can you call them in midnight to grieve. So, make sure to clean your language and be a more sophisticated you.
Initial 6-8 months is honeymoon period in true sense. Your partner is always around to hold your hand, hug you, kiss you, spend any rather most time with you as much possible and not to forget the special moments when they are ready to bring down the earth with your single drop of tears... Then continues a period of frictions and expectations, understanding, fights and all. A point of time when you feel you were stupid to build your world around your partner with that lovey-dovey stuff and all.
Finally, hit by reality, you start accepting anything that gives you peace of mind and avoids clash of interests. So, expecting the journey to be smooth from here.
What I missed all this while, was that your world can't revolve around a person. Specially, when they want their space as well. I failed to realise he needs his space too after a while. He needs his peace time for his stuffs... watever that includes... news, surfing, hollywood etc etc. Still, I was looking at my partner probably as the friend to share almost everything which he probably wasnt'.
Some men may have been programmed in a way that they talk only practical stuffs & the everyday stuffs. Definitely patient listeners, but that dsnt helps for long. After a while you need to communicate. How you feel, why you feel, what if... what if not.... cos my mind started juggling everything at midnight. Time when my partner wanted a peaceful snooze.
to be continued....