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We might grow biologically to reproduce but, sadly on intellectual grounds we seldom fail to figure out some basic differences. For instance as parents, we hardly spare a thought on what our child actually needs. Most parents merely provide their children things that they want, of course with love. So, here’s a check list of the things that your child actually ‘needs’ and doesn’t ‘demands’
1.) Quality time: Put a thousand toys in a room, and be yourself in another room, your child will run towards you and not the toys. When you spend time with them, you know every little trait of their personality. Also, the warmth of physical closeness with parent augments the bond.
2.) Freedom of Expression: Since the time a toddler begins to explore the world in his own way, he has been told more of “No” and less of “Be Careful”
If we let them explore the things instead of a plain NO, they would understand better why you were saying No. Let them learn the lessons of lives, at their pace. Let them be.
3.) Liberty to make mistakes: A child needs complete acceptance. When he makes any mistake, you should be there to rebuke, guide, but also provide comforting hug.
4.) Unconditional Love: Needless to say any parents would love their children but, they need that to be expressed.
5.) Security: Not just material securities in form of money, land and other assets but, emotional security is what makes a child strong to face the worldly challenges.
6.) Dad should be Hero not Boss, Mom should be Guide not Teacher
You are successful father when, your child wants to be like you, and a successful mother when, your child’s best friend.
7.) Stop comparing:
Every human being is blessed with immense potentiality and natural qualities. Your role as a parent is to carve a statue by just shaping. You need to identify the qualities that are already present in child and nurture them.
8.) A confidant in form of parents:
Be the kind of parents that when, your kid grows up and happens to do something wrong you are first person he comes up to confess. This would be possible only when he knows the difference between good & bad, right & wrong.
9.) Give Reasons
Mostly we set rules without explaining the reasons behind those rules. Such approach is suffocating and deeming. Instead, when you make rules give reasons behind those rules. Let them counter question, let them argue. This will boast their cognition process, they will learn to reason.
There is a fine line between being supportive parents and over-concerned parents.
Often kids miss-interoperate the excessive concern with interference. This leads to rifts and all other negative feelings between parents and children. Remember, at some point of time in their lives they will have to make a decision for themselves without you. As a responsible parents train them to make their own decisions. Let them fly, they are born with wings after all.