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If you are a parent or have observed a parent closely, you would agree that parenting is not a piece of cake. It is the toughest level in Candy crush and the hardest Sudoku ever put together! Yet the superhuman creatures called "parents" make it till the end. Wonder why? It's their superpowers! Here are a few superpowers that you'd possess very soon in your parenthood.
1. Super sonic hearing
If you are in the shower with the force of water almost clogging your ears while your baby sleeps in his cot or you are few blocks away from the playground where your child is playing. Does not matter. You will still hear your child's cry. You could hear not only their sounds but also their silence. When suddenly the house goes still, you know you have a mess waiting to be discovered. It could be a toddler playing with his own poop or a child sending off gibberish emails to the world from your laptop.
2. Precognition (future visions)
With a child around, you will always know how an accident is about to happen. It's like those visions in the Final destination movies. You will know how when your child is trying to jump from the wrong side of the bed, he'd hit the corner table then land on the colouring book lying on the floor, trip over it and fall on his nose. You will just see it like that and act three steps before it happens. Avoiding the great mishap from happening altogether.
3. Being alert even in sound sleep
Even if you manage to drift off and experience some moments of real slumber. Your subconscious mind will always stay alert and you will have an alarm set for "What was that?" You will magically wake up to a moan from a bad dream and the beginning cries of "Mama" before it reaches a crescendo. The tiniest whimper or the slightest cough will put you on your feet, ready to deal with monsters of the night.
4. You will function without sleep
You'd be up pretending to be the big bad wolf all night, telling the same story again and again. You'd sit through the night, rocking the baby on your lap. You will wake up every few minutes to a hungry baby who'd make a big poo after every drink of milk. Yet you will be ready in the morning for that client meeting or with the presentation your boss asked for. All you will need is a cup of coffee and you will be wide awake all through the day. Thank God for Coffee!
5. "Because I said so.."
This statement is a superpower in itself! It saves you from so many explanations. "Mama, why should I brush my teeth before bed?" "Why can't I wear my favourite spaceship underpants every day?" "Why can't I come to your office?" "Why can't I eat ice-cream for dinner?" "Why should I sleep at night?" There will be millions of questions (on repeat) coming your way every hour of every day. And more often that not you might run out of explanations or the right answers. You can rely on this superpower to save the day.
6. Noise immunity
You will be surrounded by child sounds : unreasonable wailing for the T.V. show that ended when he wanted more, whining for the green spoon which he never liked before, screaming because it is fun, playing noises while pretending to be Ben (from Ben 10), head-splitting sounds of toys that were (surprisingly) created by adults, etc. etc. Yet amongst all this life threatening chaos, you will manage to send that important email, read the climax of your novel, make the phone call for an appointment, drive through the streets, do the grocery shopping, try on clothes in the trial room and basically live your life.
Bonus - secret superpower:
To hell with the world, I can create my own people! - Jerry Seinfield
Hell yeah! The best superpower a parent is bestowed on having a child : You can create your own people. Definition of "The World" changes since your world changes too. Now you need not put up with the outside world anymore. You can make your own world and your own people. So, welcome to the club and don't forget to put on your cape!
Image credits: Google images