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Sneha had to leave her parent’s house and take up a job in a different city. She was 28 and according to her relatives she had already crossed the marriageable age. Every time she met them at family get-togethers, she was asked the same question, “Ab kab karegi shaadi? Koi hai toh bata de, hum baat karenge na mummy papa se. Hum karwaenge teri shaadi.” (When will you marry? If you have anyone, let us know. We will talk to your parents and will marry you off.) Sneha ignored these comments earlier, she did not want to reply back for the sake of her parents but when her younger brother got married, there was no stopping. Every day was a trauma for her. Her parents, whom she had trusted to the core and who had always stood beside her, couldn’t stand the pressures of the family members, and they too started questioning her. When Sneha couldn’t bear any longer, she started looking for opportunities in other cities and finally found a suitable one. Good package, good position and a city like Bangalore – she couldn’t have asked for anything better. So finally she left her home town Delhi, choosing to live her life on her own terms.
Sneha had no particular reason for not marrying. Infact she did meet a couple of prospects chosen by her parents. One of them asked about her complete salary details, in the other case, the boy’s mother demanded a virginity test. One of them was as dumb as a rock. Now how could she punish herself for a lifetime by getting a matchless match!!
She had finally decided that she would marry only when she was willing to, when she alone wanted to and when she found the right person. So here she was, enjoying her work and her life in Bangalore.
Within a year, she became a part of the city, made a new set of friends and started enjoying every bit of her life. Her colleagues did show interest in her but she never bothered. She was happy in a word of her own where she was away from the insulting remarks meted out by her own relatives. Every day she talked to her parents and often told them not to worry. Her parents too were satisfied to see their daughter happy but her marriage was an issue which was always there in their mind.
And then one day Sneha called them. “Mom, I am reaching Delhi tomorrow afternoon. I have taken a short break for five days and have a surprise for you.”
When Sneha reached home the other day, she told them about Amit, her roomate’s brother. He was a marketing professional working in a multinational in Pune and had come to visit his sister Pooja for rakhi. Sneha had heard a lot about him from Pooja and had learnt that he was an introvert, an intelligent fellow and sensitive too. She already had an image of his in her mind, though she never bothered to see his pictures or peep into his Facebook profile.
Pooja was on leave on Rakshabandhan. She had asked Sneha too to take a leave and that the three of them would go for a lunch out and a movie. But Sneha was not much interested, so very politely she excused herself saying that she had some important work in office.
Just when she was about to leave, Amit came. Pooja introduced the two of them and Sneha found it a bit rude to leave at that instance. She stayed back for a while and there was something about this 15-20 minutes meeting that was very different. She left for the day but somehow couldn’t help thinking of Amit. When she came back, no one was there at home. Amit had his return flight the same night and Pooja had gone to see him off. When she returned, they both chatted for a long time, mostly about Amit.
The morning was a regular affair. They both left for office and when in the evening they returned back, Pooja told Sneha that Amit had called her up to say that Sneha was the kind of girl he had always wanted as a life partner. Sneha was shocked. She did not have anything to say. The very next day Amit came over again and proposed to Sneha. She said that she needed some time to think though she knew that she was already attracted to him. Soon they became very good friends and Sneha realised that Amit was indeed the type of person she wanted to spend her life with, but it was only after a year that she accepted his proposal. By this time, she was completely in love with him.
From everything that Sneha told about Amit, her parents were more than convinced that he was a perfect match for their daughter. They met him in Delhi. Later, their families met and finally the wedding took place within a few months.
Very recently Mr Amitabh Bachchan wrote in a letter to his granddaughters “Don’t get married for any other reason than you want to get married.” And this is exactly what girls should remember. Marriage is beautiful, a committed relation between a man and a woman for life. It’s always better to enter into this commitment only when you are prepared for it and willing to with all your heart.
Marry for yourself, not for your loved ones or for your extended family or for the society at large.