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Swelling....Body Hair....Morning Sickness....The list is endless. Any mommy will resonate with the fact that there are far from fabulous symptoms and conditions associated with the 9 months of pregnancy.
However, some mommies make it through their whole nine months with barely any signs and symptoms. Their skin gets a glow, the weight they put on is distributed just right, no morning sickness etc.
But unfortunately I was not one of them. Here are a few things I really really wish someone had told me before.It would have probably eeked me out a little lesser and made life reasonably simpler, knowing that I am not the only one...
This term must have been coined by a jerk! It is nothing but a joke! Whoever said morning sickness occurs only in the morning needs to be severely belted. Nausea hits you at any time of the day or night. If you are lucky, the timing will coincide with when you are travelling using public transport, in an important meeting etc
Your boobs grow so big that all the money spent on under wired and push up bras seem a waste. Your hands and feet swell abnormally and it is agony to find a comfortable pair of shoes. If you are lucky, you will get stretch marks in places you didn't think could stretch. If you are a tummy sleeper, you are screwed after the 4th month as there is a ball between your tummy and the bed.
You will need to use the loo multiple times in a day and at night. And by multiple times, I mean ranging between once an hour to 4 times in an hour. How convenient! Oh yes! As you advance into your pregnancy, a sneeze, cough and even a laugh (Oh Yes!) can lead to leaking. Time to befriend panty liners!
You will bounce between being really horny a minute and not at all in the next minute! Added to that, your guy might think he will "poke" the baby if you have sex at that time! I have even gotten thoughts of "Is it right to do it with an innocent life in my womb?" Yeah! Hormones are a bitch!
Deciding on a name
Believe me, this can be ridiculously stressing. This is the time you realise how many people you hate. Then there are names that have different meanings in different languages! And don't forget to keep in mind the fact that how will firangis pronounce your child's name (Just in case he/she decides to go abroad to study)
Your condition is an open invitation for people to comment on everything and anything about you, air opinions and give advice - even random strangers! Comments will vary from the size of your tummy, your baby's sex, planning to breast feed or no, want a natural or c-section, how to sit, how not to listen to music as earphones can cause damage etc etc. I got comments like- "You look due any minute!", "Are you expecting twins?" etc etc.
Actually, the fact is I am big!!! That is about it! There is no need to make me feel like shit about it!
Logic says howcome strangers are allowed to pass such personal comments? But that's how it is! And of course you will be supremely hormonal when all this is being said. It takes immense training to not snap back or bitch-slap the person!
People will touch your tummy....without asking! That's how weird it can get! If they don't touch staring at your tummy is a given. Some do it subtly and some blatantly. Live with it!
Mood Swings....or Mood Attacks
Your moods will violently change! Trust me, PMS is nothing in front of this! Tears will pour out like a tap at the smallest of issues. It can be a happy ad or a sad scene from a K-serial. Unavailability of chocolate/pickles/Ice-cream (In my case - Cheese) are heinous crimes for which you will rage at the husband! Misplaced keys become a major issue and can cause an emotional outburst. Essentially you will cry about anything and everything! And shout at your guy for anything and everything!
By now, nothing you see in your panty surprises you. The milky discharge is so heavy that a panty liner is your new best friend. And the discharge also secretes an odour. This might embarrass you as you feel everyone around can smell it. But no, its only you who can as your sense of smell is magnified during pregnancy.
Make sure to drink loads of water and have enough fibers! Your growing uterus is bound to put some pressure on that area. So pooping is a strain!
My baby kicked!
Initially it feels wonderful. Later on, it's plain uncomfortable and even painful! Add to that if your baby decides it wants to move in one direction, prepare for a weird looking tummy shape for a while, which is visible to everyone.And then starts the obsession over kicking patterns! Your baby kicks less than usual- you panic and start poking and cajoling. You are planning to sleep and baby is practising karate in there - you try to soothe him/her down! Face it - they will never do what you want them to do- when you want them to do it.
Bye Bye feet
After the second trimester, you should give up the idea of being able to see your feet. If you happen to glance down, you can only see your tummy! Don't even try to paint your nails! Shaving your legs, wearing sneakers with tie-on laces can all be mammoth tasks.
Yes, hormones can be a bitch! Sudden growth of hair above the belly button sounds gross but is a reality. It will go off after pregnancy but its ewwww when its there.
Medical checks are a pain
You have to be poked, prodded...your gynaec would have inserted her hand inside you to feel the baby's position....the sonographer would have poked your tummy to get the right images, you would have had to control your bladder while the sonography is taking place....after a while you just give up!!!
For a while, you will have to bid goodbye to all your favourite junk food! It's hard!!!!
Your guy will get judged....and how!
He is going to bear the brunt of all your hormonal rages! In addition, you will suddenly find all his small-small habits really irritating! When he is sprawled in front of the TV all day on the weekend, you will find yourself sending up a prayer thinking "Oh my God....is this going to be my baby's male role model"...."What was I Thinking".....all of it does work out at the end but still....
At the end of it all, everything seems totally worth it....but it's not so fun when it's actually happening.
Got any more symptoms to add to the list? Feel free!