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"Ma Am I fat?" ....this is what i asked my mom when people started commenting on my weight..the only answer I got was to ignore those comments..well I did but for how long could I?
I was a healthy child and a foody. My complexion was dusky too...so I guess I was a package for people to comment and judge on... I used to ignore such comments until the day I reached puberty and after that I heard people telling my mom that since I was fat and dusky she should have a check on my weight and do something about my complexion as no one would wed such a girl in future....My mom seemed to be worried too...and so did all the relatives...but none of these people commented anything about my brothers obesity or looks....This was my first encounter with the harsh reality of being judged..I started losing confidence and felt bad about myself.This affected me so much that I went on a diet and lost a lot of weight during school.. Ofcourse it had adverse affects on my health, both physically and mentally ..I had to be counselled and my parents and close friends helped me sail through it.
The same people who had problems with me being fat had problems with me being thin..As i grew up i realized that no matter what you do or dont..people will always have something to say and the best example of this is marriage.. The endless list of judements, comparisons affected me and raised a lot of questions in my mind ...why do only girls/women have to go through this? The so called educated people/ society miss no chance of judging women for 1 reason or another...Why do we as women judge other women knowing how hard life can be for us?
.I know the answer for all these questions would be to ignore such judgements but there are cases where it would affect a person's wellbeing.. especially in children ..
The society is formed by people like us ..so the question we need to ask before judging/Commenting on others is "Are we Perfect"? ..Who has given us the right to judge others.?We as parents/adults need to understand that children lookup to us as an example and follow the same and hence we need to give up this habit for the sake of our children and make a better tomorrow for them.