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Its been 8 years of our marriage and i still get tensed just by the thought of my in-laws visit. I read many strong & inspiring articles on that & some of our generation writers like Chetan bhagat make it so simple that don't overburden yourself. No matter you can fulfill everyone's wish or not, you should find time for yourself. Everytime i too get motivated & thought,this time i will do it my way but then day after day, i get engrossed in so many things that my way always becomes their way.
After sometime your gym time converted into their breakfast time. Your work hours converted into lunch hours. Your hobbies time converted into other house cores. And if your situation is like me who is working from home, nobody will ever take your work seriously because for them working means only going to office.
And if you fight for your time, suddenly you will tabooed as arrogant or one who is not accepting the family....The one for whom personal life is more important than family.
But i don't able to understand one thing- why one should not get personal time.Why can't its a family's responsibility to make sure that their daughter-in law should also get time for her activities. If you are coming to your son's house, your son's routine will not change, then why to expect this from your daughter-in-law. She should follow some of her routine, so that she can also get some breathe. That will reduce her stress.
Running for 30 mins is like a stress buster for me & my husband knew this that i badly need it at the time of stress. He forced me to accompany him in gym on saturday. I went with him & felt good after long time though i know my mother-in law doesn't like it. On sunday she asked my husband that she will also go with him as if we are going for some picnic. My husband said ''Aap kya karoge vahan''
Next day she made a whole scene out of it. You both don't want to involve the family. Why can't you take your mother & sister with you. I was like, what the hell you want to do there.
Is it justified that the daughter-in-law who is happily doing everything for the family daily without complaining or shouting doesn't deserve one hour with her husband alone doing her favourite thing? I can understand they wrapped this & presented this like, we are coming for few months only. You will get a lot of time together. True, but the point is not about spending time together, Its just about doing something which makes you happy. Its just about finding time for yourself.
Your visit to the family should never makes other feel trapped. Getting your personal space, personal time is so important for everyone in family. If all in-laws will understand that then i don't feel any daughter-in -law will get stressed at the thought of her in-laws visit. Ameen!!