And hers was a Love Marriage...
|   Apr 30, 2017
And hers was a Love Marriage...

It's been twenty years or so that she was married to Mr. X. And she claimed(?) to know him for the last twenty years as she recalls her first meeting with him in college. But was hers truly a love marriage, she often wondered. Marrying against his mother's wishes, she had thought that everything would soon fall in place. Her mother in law soon gave up for the sake of her only son and agreed to the wedding. But then she had only agreed to her wedding and not accepted her. Her courtship days were great fun. The golden days of her life as she prefers to call them. A smart and bright boy that he was she fell instantly for him. He was a loner but she enjoyed his company greatly then. She had walked into his life with her eyes and ears open. Marriages are made in heaven but have to be dealt with on terra firma. Things worked well between the two because she was the submissive types and he although excellent at his work the aggressive types. Pathetic in social skills he did not have any friends. A self-proclaimed loner he liked to keep to himself. He was too engrossed in his work to take care of her. Or rather taking good care was an altogether different connotation for him. He provided her food clothing and shelter. She could have a free hand at shopping as and when she wanted to with her credit card. She took the liberty of moving around on her own. Kids were there to give her company. What she longed for was his company.All she wanted was his time. The affectionate touch, his caring gaze, his protective cover is what she greatly missed. He did not have friends and a family and nor was he cordial with her set of friends and family. Her initial nagging and complaints fell on deaf ears. She failed to understand his coarse behaviour. There was too much of personal space that their marriage offered. But now there was no way out. She had accepted his ways and become proactive with him. She had moulded herself and her children to deal with him. She felt a sense of freedom when he was away and had learnt to make good use of her time creatively. She made friends on her own, although that was tough initially, but she held on to them. Being the peace beacon of the family she knew she had to do it for the sake of her kids. After all they were her strength and support and her life revolved around them. The one golden rule she decided to follow was to live without expectations and avoid conflicts in the house. She was a woman of worth in the truest sense.Here are a few tips to deal with a spouse for whom work takes precedence over family:*Avoid conflicts. *Have your own schedule. *Engage in physical activities to use up energy.*Your children cannot replace your spouse but you can build a strong support system with them.*Find friends with common interests and similar set of values as yours.*You can have fun by investing in a hobby.*Try reducing your dependency on him and be independent.*Be your own self and live your life happily.

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