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Thanks to all for their condolences. I can hardly express how grateful I am to you all for understanding my emotions and for sharing your experiences. I really appreciate your thoughts and shared experiences. I had relived my silent grief of losing a child…up to a certain extent.
As a response to my previous post “I thought pre-eclampsia was the killer of my baby...but it was not. So many moms have asked me regarding how I become a victim of medical negligence? What pre-cautions I had taken in next pregnancy? And how can we avoid these unfortunate tragedies? So, here I am trying to share few important things that has worked for me and I hope it may help other moms too (based on my personal experience, not a substitute of a medical advice)
Of course, being a mom-to-be is most creative crowning experience for any woman... From the time of conception until the time you give birth, your body is going to go through some major changes. And all we want is a healthy baby and uncomplicated pregnancy. But unfortunately it does not happen all the time. So it is best to being aware about pregnancy complications, about your physical and mental state…even about the medical negligence. And this crucial steps of awareness starts since the time of pre-conception.
If you are thinking about planning a baby, you should do these things before get pregnant.
Steps before you get pregnant
Schedule a pre-conception visit – it is best to schedule a pre-conception visit and have a review about your personal and family medical history and discuss the medications or any supplement if you are taking. A proper medical consultation and all required test (blood sugar, thyroid level, Haemoglobin, blood pressure) will help in identified the risk factors if you have any. This is a first and vital step for ensuring a healthy pregnancy that most of us ignored unconsciously.
Adopt a healthy life style and maintain an ideal body weight- Even though eat a healthy diet, regular exercise and try to maintain an ideal body weight should be an integral part of our everyday life, but if you are in pre-conception period than this step is so vital. Especially “having an ideal weight body” is a crucial thing that can save you from many pregnancy related complications. And it will help you in having a more comfortable pregnancy and delivery.
Try to find a best and trustworthy doctor- Seeing a good doctor is critical to a successful pregnancy. But sometimes it feels too hard trying to figure out where to find a good doctor and which one matches you. Probably the best way is through the word-of-mouth. Talk to your friends who have had babies and get recommendations from them. Do a proper research and arrange a counselling session with a doctor before get pregnant. I think your inner gut feeling will give you the indication about your choice. Do not hesitate, ask questions and set a personal repo with your doctor. This step will help you a lot during pregnancy and you will always have a peace of mind.
These 3 major steps are must and will help you a lot in having a smooth and un-complicated pregnancy. But unfortunately if you already had a pregnancy loss due to any pregnancy complications like frequent miscarriages, pre-eclampsia, placental disorders….or medical negligence, then it is the time to keep an extra self-awareness. It is the time to take all safety precautions and preventive measures. For me, pregnancy after loss felt nothing like before my loss. This time things that once seemed simple became complicated. Here are few things that I have done differently in my next pregnancy, hoping it may help others.
After having a pregnancy loss
Re-analyse your pregnancy loss with a proper analysis
Of course, losing a child is most unfortunate event…and getting an emotional recovery is the most difficult part of this tragic incidence. But after getting an initial physical and emotional recovery try to re-analyse your pregnancy. Why this had happened with you? What were the risk and causative factors? Were these factors are avoidable or not? Did you have done something wrong or was it a fault of your physician? And after analysing these facts I am sure you will get a definite reason. And it is the time to work on these risk and causative factors. Talk to your doctor and clear your doubts. Make an action plan to avoid future tragedies. If you are obese try to get an ideal weight. If you diagnosed with a systemic or other disorder then take a proper treatment and get a controlled state before planning the next pregnancy. If you are a victim of medical negligence than you re-consider that all facts that were the root causes. Even you may file a lawsuit for their negligence.
I know there are some cases when there are no identifiable reasons behind the loss. But having a healthy body and a healthy mind is the first and vital thing for a healthy pregnancy and healthy baby.
Strict medical supervision for next pregnancy
If you had a history of previous pregnancy loss and had any high risk factors (such as diabetes, high blood pressure or any other systemic disease, pregnancy at an advanced age, any other gynaecological problem like polycystic ovary) plan your pregnancy under strict medical super vision. You will require close monitoring, frequent check-ups and a weekly track record of growth and development of your baby. This close monitoring is the most crucial thing that will save you and your baby from further complications.
Be prepared for early delivery
It is the most common occurrence that high-risk pregnancies have an early labour. Sometimes it is induced and sometimes it is involuntary. Whatever is the circumstances but be prepared mentally for a pre-term labour. And talk to doctor about future management.
Be calm and stay positive
The last but not the least important thing is calm and patient. I know when we had a previous pregnancy loss it creates a state of severe depression. It affects our self-esteem and courage. And we tend to get anxiety and panic attacks during next pregnancy. But try to keep a balanced mental health. A balanced mental state can reduce the burden of physical stress and you would be able to achieve your desired goal with fewer struggles.
So these were the things that I had done differently in my next pregnancy. And it has worked great for me. And as a result I would be able to be a mom. What are your thoughts? Did you have done anything differently after loss? Please share!