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Being born as a girl, I was surprisingly conscious of my looks since childhood, getting comprehensive about every glance. I started showing traits like taking time getting ready, trying to drape my mom's saris, making faces and adorable gestures in front of the mirror for endless hours, experimenting with different hairstyles and make up, keeping up-dated with latest trends carrying loads of attitude; all this and a lot more when I was as young as seven. I never wished for materialistic things, probably because I was never short of any. Though I was a chirpy average looking novice, possessing everything that mattered, I; at times dreamt of a clearer complexion, longer and thicker tresses and an extrovert approach to go with oodles of confidence; the way they present women on the screens.
As I reached puberty, these dreams of adorning my frame grew intense and I plunged into a sea flowing with innumerable like-minded bodies; ending all the excitement in a stampede, that too, under water where every bit of our beauty myth was washed out badly. This happened only after spending fortunes on celebrity endorsed products, salon visits and an equally good amount of time wasted over mission impossible. By this time, the chemical laden fake fragrances had already taken toll over my skin and hair making me grow desperate to get back my original sheen. What came to my rescue at every emergency was my grand ma's handmade concoctions prepared using nature's bountiful care.
I was a rather confused dame on the threshold of youth. The college campus had a madness in its atmosphere. Now what mattered the most was not only being noticed, but also being recognized by peers and accepted by friends. Having spend many wonderfully memorable moments with a whole lot of insane people, I owe a lot to each one of them. If someone gave me a high over the pleasure of being my own self, the other poked a peculiar pain of making me meet my true image. Having transformed into a sensible individual who now no more accounted physical attributes to be everything on the planet, I grew insightful.
I knew I had fallen for his sensitivity and humility more than anything else when I nodded affirmatively to be his better half. We lived our ways through the smooth and rough patches like crazy; out and out it turned to be the most beautiful of times I ever had. The fiction till now that there is an immense satisfaction in love became the biggest fact of my life. I realized the importance of selflessness, the agony of loneliness, the fun of sharing life's little joys and the security of being loved so dearly.
Motherhood showered my lap with god's choicest gifts. My flesh and blood shaped a reflection so miraculous that I couldn't wait to hold that magic in my hands. My children became the definition of happiness for me, I saw pleasure in their achievements and got frail at their falls. Learning to be a better parent with each milestone, I got enriched with their trust, fulfilled with their presence and furious with their wildness. All these experiences made my life an interesting lesson that perceived the reality about my beauty concepts.
Today, I see myself rejuvenated as a beautiful woman who challenges the wrinkles and dark circles indicating candles on my birthday cake. My criteria of beauty has moved deeper from skin to soul. I no longer slather myself with cosmetics as my smile makes me look much more prettier. Price tags matter no more, cause confidence is the brand I wear all time. I avoid wreaking havoc at the sight of greys, I know I am aging gracefully. I don't yell at the irregular maids as I am working on my OCD silently. I am conquering my fears, steadily; by not breaking down every time I see my children ill. I am considering my choices again, so as to stop disliking people whom I never got along with all these years, it doesn't mean I am roaming around making friends, only that I am not into making any enemies; contributing to a peaceful future, beautifying the world.
Beauty to me has a whole new concept of contentment now. Every warm smile, each caring heart, all helping hands, entire perspective of calm is so freshly beautiful. Anything that brings togetherness, cheer, satiety and melts gloom, anger, hatred is beautiful. May be late but I got to know that beauty has nothing to do with physical measures; it can never be. Real beauty deals with simplicity, leading to spiritual engagements yielding devotional joy forever...