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I know, we're not an angel. Neither is our child. But we need to Join the club of humanity!
Most of us think that trying to be a Super-Parent makes us better people. But if you pay attention, you'll see that your quest for perfection isn't good for your family. It takes lot of your time and peace of mind to run for perfection as a parent. We wanna give them best as nowadays only one or two kids are there in a family. If we’re always scanning for what’s not quite perfect, we're always finding fault with ourselves. We're giving our children the message that they aren't quite good enough. We're not giving ourselves unconditional love, so we can't give it to our kids, either. Because if our cup is empty how can we fill their cups?Always living in the guilt of imperfection is not required for a strong bond to be built.
But once we accept that "I'm not OK, and you're not OK, but that's perfectly OK!" we’re more loving and compassionate, more forgiving in our own world. We stretch our hearts, so we become more peaceful parents, and happier people.
So just say no to the Perfect Parent Myth and lose the guilt. Remind yourself that what kids really need is for you to model how to be a gracious, loving human being in the face of our inevitable human imperfections. Your children won't remember what dresses you wore, or whether your house was spic and span. But they will remember how you apologized for your mistakes and tried to understand when things got tough between you. they will always remember the strong connection which you established with them. Being a role model you show them its OK to commit mistakes but correcting them is more important.
Go ahead. Get messy in the autumn leaves with your child. Serve Maggi and Pasta sometime for dinner. Just say no to friends sometimes for dinners and spend some qualitative time with kids to make some good memories. Spend all day Sunday in pajamas with your kids, laughing while you make pillow houses and start pillow fights.
The sad news is that even if we’re committed to being the best parent, and best person, we can be, we will never be perfect. Life happens. We get off track. We get disconnected -- from our child, our partner, our own deepest guidance. We see the other person as making our life more difficult, rather than realizing that they're having a hard time. We feel hurt, we feel frustrated, we feel trapped. We lash out.
Instead of beating yourself up, take one step in the direction you want to go. Walk away when you're mad, instead of yelling. Step back from a power struggle and reconnect. STOP DROP AND BREATHE. Try to see things from a child's perspective. Empathize with him
The good news, is that the journey of our life is running around from the individual steps we take every single day. The more quickly we notice those actions that are taking us in the wrong direction, the easier it is to course correct.
You’ll be surprised to see your relationship with your little one as you corrected your mistakes in the due course of time. So he has the memories of the way you apologized rather than the mistakes.