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As my bio on this site says, "I write real stories that I have either witnessed personally or have seen closely". I was just surfing some websites when my I got a call from a lady who wanted to speak to me regarding her interview for a position. After taking a sabbatical of 5 years, she was not sure that how should she approach a company on her own for a job. But as per her CV she was employed at a bank of high repute and I was aghast to learn that how low was the confidence that she was harboring.
I discussed with her a little bit about it, and then suddenly she said, I am facing a problem Parul. I said 'Problem'? What sort of problem? She said, that her husband is a perfectionist and is a super successful person in his career. He keeps an eye on her every activity and scold and ridicule her way of doing things. I was a little bit uneasy to listen to her emotional outburst as I hardly knew her and she was discussing about the person closest to her to a stranger like me. But then I decided to lend an ear.
She told me that she loves to be around those people who she admires. For example, if she goes to a family gathering and she wants to speak to any other lady there, her husband doesn't like this. He even warns her not to chat/talk to anyone over facebook or phone. I gathered some courage and asked her that if her husband is possessive about her? To which which she told me that he husband says that he doesn't want the world to know about that how she is, how less knowledge she has and hoe naive she is. Means he doesn't want the world t know that how stupid she is. And I found it so stupid on her husband's part to behave like this.
I asked her that what is the reason behind his such kind of behavior. She said that her husband has always been very very successful as an employee and is a very knowledgeable person. And expects the same from her. She left her job at a very very reputed bank to take care of her daughter. As per our conversation, during the early days of her marriage, her husband used to tell her that I will mail you a letter of appreciation if you excel in the tasks (homely) assigned to you.
Letter of appreciation? I mean what the f*ck? Aree bhai, agar dena hi hai tho, gifts do, date per le jao, shopping karo, kisses do surprises do, trips per le jao. What is this damn "Letter of Appreciation"? And who gave you the right to judge anyone's work? This is not your office dear. Office ki duniya se bahar aoo"
Now getting back to this lady. Now she wants to prove her worth in front of her husband by working again. What I told her is to go back to work only if she wants to prove something to her self and NOT to anyone else. Then only she would be able to do justice to her work, her life and her daughter.
No matter how far and up she goes in her career, people like her husband would say, this little you have achieved, so less. They would never appreciate your effort.
Then I told her to handle all this with a trick. I said tell your husband to help you to search a job. Ask for his guidance and advice frequently in your career. Tell him that with whom you spoke and what, ask if she should do it or not.Be his responsibility, forcefully. Then he would never get a chance to ridicule his own responsibility and he would pay a lot of attention towards her growth.
But I really felt sad to know that how many different kind of maniacs live in our society, that are considered highly successful in their offices but become a failure at home when their wives have to share their loneliness with strangers.