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We 5 college friends had a get together after 7 years at my place. Time flies in a snap. Now all mothers. We were having a gala time, so much of gossiping and bitching. We asked each other how their kids were doing. Priya said "My boy is super active and he loves to run, I am planning to coach him for running, who knows he becomes a great runner one day." Geetanjali said "My princess has a sharp mind and she loves aeroplane, will guide her to be a pilot, after all we have to think about their future as well". Mona asked Shreya about her kid. After a pause she said "I just want him to become a good human being". I immersed in my mobile phone soon gave her a look and my eyes telling her, this is so true. They all went back to their families but those lines of Shreya were still echoing in my ears, "I just want him to become a good human being". At night in bed I asked my husband "What are our plans for our son's future". While staring at his laptop he said "We have taken policies and insurances. Do not worry, he would be financially secure". I said "No, I am not aiming in that direction." He gave me glance with a question mark on his face as if saying then what else. I clarified by saying that my aim for him is to be a gentle human, a good person by heart and soul. Besides securing our kids' future financially, is this not our responsibility as parents, to build them as a good human being? I guess parent's main aim should be to get the best person as a human out of their kid.
Always remember, kids learn what they see, they grasp what they observe, they speak what they hear, they practise what they notice, they react what they feel. So before proceeding towards making them a good human, we ourselves have to first see good, speak good, feel good and the miracle will happen on its own.
I took those lines of Shreya damn seriously and began to think of what I must do and what I should practise to create a good human. And reached to the following conclusion.
Respect: Teach them to respect every single creature on this planet. Talk politely and calmly. Tell them to spread love, affection and to always help others. Sharing is caring could be a good one liner.
This one is especially for boys, teach them to always respect and take care of girls and to never hurt them.
Hygiene and cleanliness: Always maintain hygiene and cleanliness in your home and surroundings. We must never litter or throw waste on street sides. If they would watch us doing so, will practise the same in future. Which is not fair in any sense. Kids learn what they see.
Save energy: Never waste natural resources like water and electricity in your homes. Close taps if water starts pouring out and turn off home appliances when not in use. Kids practise what they notice.
Etiquettes : Try not to shout at them or in front of them. Never abuse them or in front of them. Try not to show them videos with violence and abuse. Kids speak what they hear.
Quenching their curiosity: Try to quench their thirst of knowing more and curiosity by answering all questions positively and without getting annoyed. Kids grasp what they observe.
Value money: Let them know the value of money this would help them to survive even if there would be financial crisis in future. But at the same time, they must also know that money is just part of your life and not your life.
Company matters: Try to keep an eye on their friends and company. There is a famous phrase in Hindi "SANGATI KA ASAR" and that makes all understandable.
Communication is must: Give your time to them. Talk to them. And if an adolescent, then communication is must. This will help you to understand them well and could be a solution to the issue that arise at this fragile age.
Everything in excess is bad: Excessive love and care can also be called as possessiveness. Which is not always good. Too much of pampering cannot give you better results. So, we need to stop them if find doing something not correct and if required must scold also. If a slap could lead them to a bright future and towards their betterment, then there is nothing wrong in it.
And on top of everything are truth and honesty. We need to make our kids understand that be truthful and honest to yourself and to everybody. If today humanity persists then it's because of truth and honesty.
The above are just few points and there is lot more to be added. We need to prepare them for future so that they could survive even in their most crucial times.
All the wrong deeds happening around us makes us sad. Parents try to make their kid a better human but sometimes it's the society and circumstances as well that force a nice hearted human to exchange his soul with an ill hearted human. But at least we can try to lay a fair foundation stone. I am trying and I know you are also. Let's get together and dream of a world full of love.