I am a mom who doesn’t like kids
|   Jul 15, 2016
I am a mom who doesn’t like kids

What's the first reaction when most of us see a baby, your heart melts, then words like aww so adorable, such a cutie, I wish I could just take that munchkin into my arms, pop out of your mouth. But the first thought that comes into my mind is, gosh! I hope they don't ask me to hold the baby. I mean I have a three year old of my own, yet I can still get so awkward while holding a baby. The thing I dreaded the most was being pooed/peed upon.I have never really liked kids and more so in my younger days. Being around kids was just not my cup of tea. I always wondered how people raised kids of their own. 24 hours under the same roof with a kid was something that I couldn't fathom. The need to constantly feed them, bathe them, clothe them, coming up with interesting activities for them, playing with them, were things that were meant for super humans who were blessed with oodles and oodles of one virtue, which is patience. 

However to make up for my complete lack in child rearing skills came my husband. He is the complete opposite of me in this aspect. During the initial days of our courtship I observed that he loved kids. He could start of a conversation with any kid he would come across. If we went to a restaurant and came across a baby, he would immediately take the baby in his arms and I would squirm sheepishly hoping that he wouldnt hand over that kid to me. Hoping that my cloddish behavior wouldnt be evident, I would coo from a distance and make cute faces, so that both my boyfriend and the babys parents dont think I am some alien.

The fact is that the world can't imagine any human being with the XX chromosome not liking kids. It is an innate quality that every woman must possess. I thought I never had that quality, but surprisingly when I had my own, i felt something tug at my heart, something in-explainable. I was falling in love all over again and this time it was with a baby. I was surprised and taken aback about my fierce possessiveness for this little guy in my arms. Cleaning his poo and pee never made me wince with disgust. I feared it was some chemical locha in my head that was making me behave like this and would fade away after some time. But thankfully it still exists, at least for my own kid.

I thought that I had changed, but then recently, when someone else handed me a baby again I was all gawky and awkward again. The same feeling of dread took over me. I guess some things just dont change

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