10 Species of Brides one encounters in India
|   Feb 23, 2017
10 Species of Brides one encounters in India

Inspite of the variety and diversity among the people of India, one thing that binds them together (apart from Cricket and Bollywood of course) is the big fat Indian wedding. Go to any city, any town or village at any time of the year, one can invariably see an Indian wedding - with all the band baja and splendor. And with the wedding, second most important thing one cant miss, taking the center is - the leading lady herself, the BRIDE of the wedding !!!

The quintessential Indian bride or the DULHAN is a unique and exceptional species of human being which has its own characteristics and categories. This species is mostly found in Indian weddings but is also spotted sometimes in a cluster of young girls from early twenties till late thirties. Impossible to miss in a crowd and difficult to handle for long due to influx of marriage hormones, it is best to get her married at the earliest to avoid further psychological and financial damage to her parents.

Just like there are different wedding rituals from different states of India, the Indian brides can be classified based on behavioral patterns and exclusive qualities. And because Bollywood forms an integral part of all the Indian weddings, here are some categories of Indian brides to be based on their Bollywood counterparts.

  1. The Geet: (Kareena Kapoor, Jab we met)

The typical over excited and over enthusiastic chulbuli Indian girl whose only dream in life is to get married at the first chance she gets. This girl has everything planned in advance like her wedding dresses, foot wear, jewelry, honeymoon destination and the color of the curtains in her new house as well. The only thing missing is the groom and she will not rest until she gets him. She attends others wedding in her best outfit so that someone would spot her and propose. Filling up her profile on the matrimonial website is more interesting than filling up a job application form. All in all, she is likely to get married in her early twenties the moment she completes her graduation.  

2. The confused Queen: (Kangana Ranaut, Queen, Tanu weds Manu)

This girl is perennially confused about everything in her life. Right from her body, her looks, her color and hair till the way she speaks, behaves, walks, talks, everything. First she is confused whether she should marry or not. Then she decides to get married because she thinks marriage will end all her confusion. Then again she is confused about whether she is getting married to the correct guy. Even after that, she will be confused why her confusion is still haunting her. Confused ??? The best way out for such bride is to blindly follow what her parents tell her.

3. The Fashionista Aisha (Sonam Kapoor):

Pretty clear from the name itself. Isnt it ? This bride is a complete fashionista and wants to get married only to showcase her enviable collection of couture fashion. She is absolutely chick and sophisticated in her behavior and there isn’t a hair out of place even when she wakes up. Someone once said “Shadi ek aisa beauty contest hai jo har ladki jeet jati hai.” It was written for her. 

4. The ideal Poonam (Amrita Rao, Vivah)

The quintessential Indian “sharmilee bahu”, this girl never raises her voice and speaks with her eyes. Intelligent yet subservient, she will always prioritize her husband before her own needs. She has her independent personality yet she will hold family honor in the highest place. And the most important quality, she will wear chiffon sarees or satin salwar suits at home plus she will blush (oh my god) at the slightest praise from her husband. Now this is one of the rarest category and on the verge of extinction in this age. And if by chance a man gets hold of this kind of bride, he is the subject of envy for the entire city.  

5. The selfish Sonia: (Priyanka Chopra, Aitraaz)

She is the Pukka gold digger and on a look out for that one rich and successful bachelor in town. Once she finds him, she will leave no stone unturned to seduce him and do everything to keep him like the Cleopatra. All her earlier boyfriends are practice sessions and preparation grounds for reaching the top boss. She is otherwise harmless unless you wish to expose her true identity in front of others. And if you help her in her game, she might be generous enough and hook you up with a manager from her man's company or the likes.

6. The successful Sheetal (Sridevi, Laadla)

This girl does not want to marry in the first place. She is a self-made girl, extremely successful with a huge business empire running on her single command. She is also an OCD, a control freak and always wants to be on top of the game. So she can never accept someone above her or for that matter even at par with her. If at all she gets married, she will do it just for getting a revenge or teaching someone a lesson or win a bet. Once she has won, she can easily kick the husband out of her palace and life as well

7. The feminist Shabana:

Its really sad that Bollywood hasn’t come up with a really strong feminist character in any of the films yet. So the legend Shabana Azmi wholly and completely as herself is the only one who comes to my mind. This breed wants to get married for all the right reasons but on her own terms. She will work after marriage of course but also pay half the bills. She will do only half the chores at home and she will have her say in all the family decisions. She will take her own decisions concerning her own money, investment, interests etc. She will be actively involved in women's issues within her society, office, cultural club and make her opinion known on social media and public platform.  And finally, SHE WILL NOT CHANGE HER SURNAME. PERIOD.

8. Humpty Sharma ki dulhania

This bride does not have an independent identity. Because she loves to be called as "Someone's wife/fiance/girlfriend etc. She is so much in awe and head over heels in love with her man that the only thing she can talk about is HIM. Right from how well he talks and behaves till his work, his business, his earning, everything. The painting in his living room and the brand of his underwear – everything is a subject of admiration, pride and love for the girl. She might also explain you how her man is so health conscious because he plays carom at the elite sports club every Sunday (whatever that means!!). She is the mother of the phrase “Pati Parmeshwar”.

9. The reluctant Anushka (Rab ne bana di Jodi)

She gets married because nothing else is happening in her life which is more interesting. She gets married to the boy her parents choose for her. After marriage she gets settled with her husband and lives happily ever after. And this is not a fairy tale. Its actually true. And almost 50 percent of Indian girls fall under this category. 

10. The perfect Piku (Deepika Padukone)

Finally. Just like the Poonam, this breed is also rare yet not on the route to extinction. In fact this breed is growing fast and with little support can create wonders for the society. She is independent, strong and can handle home and office simultaneously with patience and elegance. She also takes care of the old family members. She gets married only because she wants to get married and loves the guy. And once she ties the knot, she sticks to her man till death do them apart. A perfect wife and mother, she is the best bride a man can ever have.

There are numerous other sub categories as well but I chose to not write about them fearing I might get sued by the feminist brigade. J

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