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At the end of another gruelling day ... Aura spotted me sitting lost .. with my phone in my hand ...
Aura : Ma ... kya hua
Me : kuch nahi
Aura : Stop lying .... you know na we should share everything .... Headache hain .. kissi ne kuch kaha .. koi tension .....
while I denied anything . she proceeded to give me a biggggg bear hug while saying - jo bhi ho its OK ... aap meri STRONG mom ho na :)
Surprised ,, confused , different emotions passing in through me - not on the words spoken or the emotions outpoured by her - it was natural , she was imitating the way I behave with her when she is upset or angry or nervous or hurt .
I was Surprised what happened within me - while she hugged me and patted my back - I simply choked in , tried fighting back the tears which still came ... uninvited ... freely
what was happening to me
I am the Strong One
I am the Mature One
I am MOM
and she was the child - But at that one moment , that fraction of a second , our roles changed in - and I felt an emotion which I had been longing for - an emotion which at times I thought didn't existed in me , an emotion called " BEING MOM " - it was right there and believe me it was a beautiful feeling :)
There are times when all of us at some juncture or the other must have felt we are not fit to be a MOM - being mother does not come naturally to us , for me the feel came in a bit too much - may be cause of my running around and fending for my family - may be cause of my approach of making my little one strong and emotionally independent - I was more of a friend to my angel rather than a MOM and this feeling was totally uncalled for - I was yearning for - was missing this emotional connect with my daughter and now as if the circle completed itself :)
and while she was patting my back crooning love you in my ear , I was leaning my head on her shoulder - completely at peace.
At peace od being a MOM
Thank you AURA for making me a MOM
and while I am writing this ,, she is reading the last line ,, pats my hand and says " Welcome "