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“It Takes 2 to take the vows of marriage”
“It takes 2 to love and be loved”
“It takes 2 to make a baby”
Then why do we hesitate when we say “It takes 2 to raise a baby”
There is a famous saying, “Only a mother can think the best about her child. No one can replace her.” But then I would like to add, “A mother cannot replace a father’s role in the growth and development of child.”
I had an opportunity to be a part of a bloggers meet organized by Mycity4kids in association with Pampers. It is a great initiative by Pampers to bring about a change in the mindset of people by propagating the idea of #ItTakes2 to raise a child.
It was a very interactive session with thought provoking ideas from Mr. Sushant Kalra and Mrs. Shelja Sen.
A Survey conducted by Neilson in association with Pampers shows that Fathers get involved with their kids only when the kids are a little older. When the child is 1-2 years old, the whole sole responsibility of the Childcare is on the shoulders of the mother.
Another survey by Neilson in association with Pampers tells that, 97% doctors agree that, for overall development babies need their mama and papa both.
Then why do Dads take a backseat when it comes to childcare, when it comes to diapering, when it comes to sleepless nights and when it comes to spending quality time with the child. Is it their apprehension? Is it their misconception that, “Their wife’s are best at it? So leave it to them.” No, parenting does not come naturally to women. She learns it over the time. The same goes for men. They can acquire this skill, once they break all barriers, just jump in and get involved.
Rightly said by Mr. Sushant Kalra, “Men have masculine features and women have feminine. Both Mother and father have to spend quality time with their child, so that they can teach and imbibe values in their kids in their own ways.”
Another hindrance in father’s involvement in child care is “We, the mothers”. We think that we know better. We have this habit of correcting, interrupting and nagging that, “No, you are not doing it correctly”, “This is not the way”, “Let me teach you.” Why can’t we just hold ourselves back and watch, and let them learn on the job.
A mother may be great at art and craft, bedtime stories, cooking etc; on the other hand a father may be great at playing volley ball, excursions and adventures etc. So both partners have to decide which part of their best they can give to their child. Again the activities cannot be compartmentalized, but the idea of sharing their best can bring out the best in the child.
Please share your views on “It Takes 2” to raise a baby. Also, please share what kind of Dad are you/ Dad is your husband:
1) I Don’t Care Dad: He is the one hidden behind newspapers and busy with TV/laptop/mobile. Diapering, feeding, playing with child etc are words from distant planet for him.
2) Micromanaging Dad: He finds faults with everything her wife does. With his hands in the pocket, he instructs everything to his wife on how to take care of child.
3) Fun Dad: Kids love this dad. Kids think they have a nagging and disciplinarian mother and they love spending time with their father, who is a spoil sport.
4) Ninja Dad: From Day 1, they take active participation in everything whether it be diapering, to sleepless night, to playing with kids, helping them out in their homework etc.
So, all the Dads out there, common on, Buck up! Your child needs your time. More than that, your presence, your touch and your care.