Staying in an unhappy marriage for kids!!!
|   Jul 11, 2016
Staying in an unhappy marriage for kids!!!

Renuka is a decent girl and is married with Sumit from 7 years. They are not happy with each other. Sumit’s parents have tortured her from day 1 of her marriage so she decided to quit her relationship with them and Sumit have problem with that. They fights for whole day and their daughter is now used to see all this.

She is blessed with a beautiful daughter and she loves her a lot. Like many other mothers, her child is the only reason to bear all this depressive arguments. She is living with her husband just because he is the father of her daughter. She is living in an unhappy marriage from so long that she has forgotten what happy looks like. They look like happy couple to all but they are not. Her friends know the actual situation well so she can’t pretend to be happy with them. Her 3 year old daughter can understand all this, although she can’t point out the actual reason but she knew that mom is not happy. She can understand that mom is just acting even if Renuka tries to pretend happy in front of her daughter.

She is a great mother and is stick around in this unhappy situation, believing that she must be doing the right thing by staying married for her children. She chooses unhappiness for herself as she wants to choose happiness for her daughter. She is trying to spend her life in this miserable marriage because she thinks that life will be worse if she will opt to leave her husband – “LOG KYA KAHENAGE”. Although she don't mean to, she is lying to herself and hurting herself and her daughter too.

Should she do this? Staying in an unhappy marriage so that your children can stay happy is not true. If you are unhappy and for a long period of time, how do you expect your children to grow as a happy kid? Do you want your children to feel responsible for your sadness? They can understand. Don't do this to them or yourself.

How will she manage her expenses? She is an engineer and is not working from so many years. Does it mean that she won’t get a job? She will definitely get a job and can manage expenses. Yes it may be difficult in the beginning and can be hard sometimes but so is parenting.

Kids should live in a happy environment. That one thing is extremely important for mental and physical growth. Kids are smart enough to understand and accept the situations. Believe me that fighting all day in front of kids can harm them more than living with single parent. Mother’s mental health is extremely important for a kid’s normal growth.

You should not live in this kind of marriage just for kids. I am not saying that you should again go to your parent’s house but you can always ask them to help when and if required. I know few girls who opted to leave their husband's and they are living a happy life.

My view: She is strong enough to decide which is harder: being miserable and trapped, or being free and struggling. The struggle will end but the misery will not.

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