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The time when we were growing up was such that it was absolutely normal,natural and healthy on the part of our teachers and elders to check or control us in whatever way they wanted.They were free to scold us,punish us and even take recourse to the 'rod'if they felt that the situation demanded such an action.In other words,they believed that if you spare the rod,you will spoil the child.
So,a slap on the back,standing on one leg,standing outside the classroom,twisting of the ear and even pulling the hair was considered to be a part of our education,a part of our growing up into disciplined young children.
But over the years this very concept of being too strict with young minds has diminished.It does not hold water any more.The present generation is altogether a new and different race.They are sensitive,emotional and at the same time very strong mentally.That is why they have to be dealt with lot of love,care and attention.
It is really difficult to understand and cater to their needs,especially,emotional ones.The other day,my neighbour,rang up her only child,who studies outside and said,"Do not eat (a particular product)as it is not considered to be safe".Her child replied,"Please I know this.I also read newspaper.Do not lecture me."Her eyes turned moist.On the other hand,if we do not tell them anything,they blame their parents as insensitive and careless. What made me to think about this topic was my chance meeting with a lady who appeared to me very depressed and disturbed.On further query I learnt that her 14 years old son committed suicide because he was rebuked by his father for not doing well in his exams.I was shocked!A father does not even have the right to scold his own son!The buck does not stop here.A 12 years old girl in our locality attempted suicide because her mother used to accompany her everywhere.She felt that her freedom was being curbed by her over protective mother!
Now,being a mother myself I firmly believe that our present generation are completely different in their outlook and attitude.We cannot impose our views on them.They will not adhere to it.It really becomes a very dangerous proposition if we become too strict with them.The consequence can be disastrous like those two instances that I have mentioned.But believe me,this is just a tip of the iceberg.
So,balancing must be the key to maintain a cordial relation with them.I know a family where the mother was extremely possessive with her son.One day,the boy,who was then 15,came over to my place for some help regarding a particular subject.Suddenly,his mother dashed into our room and started screaming at him,"Why were you talking with that boy while coming here?I told you not to talk with him".The boy was so angry that he screamed back,"And how many times have I told you to leave me alone".This went on.I and my mother was stunned.His mother started crying.He wanted to rush out when I stopped him and took him to the other room.I started talking with him.He calmed down,gradually,and said me " My mother never speaks to me nicely.She always follows me where ever I go and scolds me all the time".He went on and on.
The clash,the conflict...should be avoided at any cost.Talking,communicating and giving them respect is really so very important.I realized it that day.
In order to put our present generation on the right track the most important thing is to be friendly with them.Communication,love and being sensitive to their needs can help us to create a deep bonding with our children which in turn can help them to grow up as beautiful individuals who possesses a strong mind of their own.