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It was a large gathering. We had gone to attend a family function on my maternal side. Men were busy talking about work and women busy with gossips. “See my daughter in law abc, she is still focusing on career, and yet to give birth to a child, it is almost a year now –I have told her a hundred times that my son will take care of earning a lot – you first give birth to a grandchild” . The others cast a sympathy vote to this fat mother in law who was so well taken care of by her daughter in law. I felt really bad for the DIL who was being embarrassed behind her back. I could imagine her plight at home.
We were back from the function and I had to get back to work with Monday blues. My colleague sitting beside me was almost in tears, I noticed. I enquired and she said – “I want to do my higher studies. My parents have saved a lot of money but my mother is denying me the money because they want to spend it for my wedding. They are looking for a filthy rich family to get me married to and my mom is even ready to pay half of the savings as Dowry. They are almost finalizing the engagement date and I am feeling helpless.”
I could actually see a pattern. I quickly shut the strong thought that was about to explode in me and went back home. There was a TV serial going on where the mother in law hated the daughter in law, there was this cousin who was trying to cheat and grab the heroine’s husband, there was this woman in office who was trying to build a case against her woman colleague so she could grab the promotion for her. Wow. What is happening? Who is against who? Women against a women – is that the truth? Why are TV soaps portraying women against women – to increase their TRP or is it to trigger deep emotions amongst the women who watch them day in day out? Why was the mother in law favoring the daughter but cursing her daughter in law for the same issue – to give birth to a child soon after marriage? We need to revisit ourselves. Let’s keep a check on our mindset. Let us make our mothers, mother in laws, aunts and our fraternity understand that we are only supposed to support each other and not pull each other down or turn against each other .This is not a war. This is a large scale revolution to empower women everywhere and women need to hold hands and strengthen the revolution for the greater good. Men’s attitude needs to change too, I don’t deny. But I strongly feel we need to start with the women else the whole purpose stands defeated. Let’s hold hands and stand united. Let’s stay together and bring about a change in our own attitude. Let’s erase the mindset of “Women against women”, let’s cultivate the healthy mindset of “Women for women”. Let’s rise and shine.